Now and then…
My life is not as glamorous as the movies. Sometimes I fret
about how things are and how things should be. Actually, I think those things
are conditioned in me because of television and novels. This is real life, for
crying out loud! Grand gestures of love portrayed in movies are mere fiction. Boy
meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love. Boy and girl live happily ever after.
How many people do you know have it that way?
As for me, girl meets boy. Girl falls in love with boy. Boy
and girl hook up. Boy pisses off girl. Girl humiliates boy at work. Boy and
girl don’t talk for a year. Boy and girl move on. Boy and girl meet again. Girl
is in relationship. Boy and girl meet again. Boy and girl fight. Boy and girl
meet again. Boy and girl finally grow up.
After much pondering, I know now that I need to measure this
relationship to my standards. Yes, I used the big “R” word. I am in a real life
relationship with HIM. It took four years and countless other people in our
lives to get here. I got what I wanted and now I need to stop worrying that
this is a dream that I am going to wake up from.
We used to go on long periods of not calling each other
after spending a night together. It was totally common for us to not speak for
three weeks up to a month and then we hook up again. Now, we don’t get through
a day without speaking or at least a simple text. That is a huge upgrade from
Mr. I-Don’t-Have-To-Explain-Myself-To-Anyone.
He never picks up his phone unless it’s a business call.
Leave a message and he will call you back if he deems worthy. He hates people knowing
where he is or what he is doing. Mr. Catch-Me-If-You-Can
gave me the keys to his apartment yesterday and added me to his emergency
contact list. He leaves clothes at my place and has his own toothbrush here.
Mr. Commitment-Phobic met my friends and hangs out with my
brothers. He is perfectly comfortable walking into my place of work knowing that
he is being scrutinized. He makes plans with me and he introduced me to his
friends and family in Boston.
I believe him when he says we have the rest of our lives together.
So, I guess he is my boyfriend. I guess he has been my
boyfriend for the past two months but I have just been too afraid to admit it,
scared to jinx it. It’s not easy to enjoy today because of all the baggage from
yesterday. There were two people who I thought were my friends and they said to
my best friend, “You know he will never love her, right?” That still
hurts today but you know what? Up yours! He loves me more than he has any other
woman. So, this is my happy ending…
