The world according to me…

Okay, like I said, I am in the capital of the world…so many nationalities, so little time. I love meeting new people and I love telling them, I am from Malaysia. I especially like the ignorant ones who don’t understand that I am also Chinese. I have fun with all these people from all over the world. I am not too into Europeans…except the English (ahh, my former colonial masters). My favorites of course are my fellow Commonwealth delegates, especially Kenyans and Nigerians. One phrase ALWAYS come in handy and impresses people when I am out; so I thought I share them…

• Dutch: Ik hou van je!
• French: Je t’aime!
• German: Ich liebe dich!
• Italian: Ti amo!
• Japanese: Kimi o ai shiteru!
• Polish: Kocham ciebie!
• Tagalog: Mahal kita!
• Swahili: Nakupenda!

I am single in the capital of the world. So what do I do? I have the time of my life!!! I love my friends. Ny, you totally rock! Tina, thanks for keeping up with my crazy antics. I try to go out at least once a week. I have already been out twice this week…and I am going out again tonight. Why not, right? C’est la vie, my friend. I spent all my college years at home with a dumb ass man because he was too insecure to take me out. Now, I am just making up for lost time…and I pay my own way. I make my own money and I can do whatever I want. I don’t giving a flying rat’s ass what you think!

I met a really, REALLY sweet guy last night. We totally clicked and he was a total gentleman. I thought about him all night…but I f**cked up again. If I could go back in time I would have given you my number but…I kept thinking about HIM and I pulled away. Greg, I am sorry. Oh well, no use crying over spilled milk. If it is meant to be, we will meet again. As for HIM, I am sooooo over him (well, kinda). Time to see other people…need the space and the break. Me and HIM…we are the real deal. I can wait a lifetime for HIM…but that don’t mean I am not going to enjoy myself NOW. I am a flamin’ hot Asian in the baddest city in the world…girl, I am livin’ la vida loca! FYI, all these pictures of me are at www.joonbug.com Kewl, huh?

I am so NOT superstitious. I don’t believe in fate or luck. In fact, I don’t even read my horoscope. Life is life…and everything that happens to us is a consequence of another’s action and not some magical invisible force. I got fun airbrush tattoos yesterday. I got a super cool claw on each of my boobs…my homage to Eve! Then I got Greek alphabets on my wrists to symbolize my relationship with him; Alpha on my right and Omega on my left. Alpha symbolizes the beginning but more importantly, I wanted the Omega which symbolizes the end. It’s been so hard for us and I get so tired of trying. I want to give up and move on. I felt that the two symbols represent us. We have come full circle…and we are not meant to be together. We had our beginning and now, end. I went to bed and my Omega was gone in the morning. My claws have faded significantly too…but my Alpha remains so clear and fresh. I scrubbed it but it still remains. Are we still only beginning? Even if there is only a fraction of a chance for us to survive, I will keep trying. Everywhere I go, I see and smell things that remind me of him. I smile every time I see an ad for Stella Artois. Maybe there is a force guiding us in life, wait is all I can do because my Alpha remains…

M, I had a great time tonight. I love talking to you and you are so sweet. Not to mention you’re a pretty snazzy dresser. BTW, thanks for the discount! I have guy friends but none as honest and genuine as you. Not only are you a great listener, you give great, sensible advice. Thanks for looking out for me and HIM. More importantly, thanks for understanding me and HIM. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

I consider you a friend and I want good things for you. I will help you through this rough time. Everytime you want to call her, please call me instead. Everytime the memories get you down, think of the stupid things I said to you all day at work and laugh it off. Everytime you get depress or lonely, we will go out, okay? Next movie is on you but I get to pick!

Most people who know me know I was in hell two years ago (wow time flies!). You can’t enjoy the ups without the lows. I got over it and you can too. I love my new life and I am truly, madly and deeply in love with the most wonderful man in the world. I see the wonderful you and I know that a really, REALLY girl is out there for you. I am here for you, buddy. You are a great guy, no doubt about that! *HUGS*

7 Things I Plan To Do Before I Die:
1. Meet Keanu Reeves (love of my life!)
2. Have HIS child (It’s gotta be HIS kid or I am adopting!)
3. Watch the sunrise in Nairobi and sunset in Ipoh with HIM
4. Climb the Eiffel Tower
5. Find a replacement for Caprice
6. Buy my own house (must have a pool, pool house, library and gym)
7. Learn how to swim

7 Celebrity Crushes:
1. Keanu Reeves (If you know me, you wouldn’t even have to ask!)
2. Clark Gable (Old is gold, peeps!)
3. Kanye West (Mr. Best Dressed? I will rip off them clothes in a heartbeat!)
4. Orlando Bloom (Every gal needs a pretty boy now and then!)
5. Taye Diggs (My man is a look-alike!)
6. Tyson Beckford (My man has his body!)
7. Djimon Honsou (He has such presence…and those lips!)

7 Happy Memories:
1. Weekend of August 19-21, 2005
2. Getting my first REAL job
3. The first time HE kissed me
4. Buying my first car
5. The first time HE asked me out
6. When I FINALLY believed that Kim and Pink really, REALLY accept me for me; no judgements what so ever!
7. Everytime someone sees how truly fabulous I am! LOL

I just got off the phone with him. How can his voice be so wonderful? Granted he is a little hammered but I adore this man. I can sit and listen to him talk all day. He talks about the Kenyan constitution and I am in awe. He talks about his mum and I am blown away. He tells me about the bunion on his toe and I am nodding away excitedly! No matter what he talks about I hear music and it echoes in my heart for days.

Everytime he calls, my spirits are lifted. He was just telling me about his day and his plans for the weekend. I haven’t seen him in days. He is having one of those weeks where he needs his space. He had a semi-major change this week so I just let him be until he is back to his old self. With us it’s not how much time we spend together but what we do when we are together. Which is why I love it when he calls because he so genuine and he is a great listener.

His laughter is always hearty and it booms across the room. Laughter is contagious but his laugh is the Level Four Code Red kind. He laughs from his heart and it’s the most amazing sound on earth. His voice and laughter is the sound of the music to my ears and it feeds to my heart and soul.

Man, did we pig out on Thursday night! I took my good pal C to dinner and we did not hold back at all. We went to a really REALLY nice restaurant, The Capital Grille. She is such a wonderful and fun person to be with. She really deserved a good treat…courtesy of my ex (long story!). We ordered two appetizers, the Lobster and Crab Cakes and the Pan Fried Calamari With Hot Cherry Peppers. Both were delicious. Seriously, I can still taste the succulent calamaris! C had the special that night, the NY Strip aged for 21 days. I went for the Sliced Filet Mignon with Cippolini Onions and Wild Mushrooms. We also ordered two sides, Potatoes Au Gratin and Roasted Seasonal Mushrooms. Nothing comforts like red potatoes smothered in cheese. We can’t even begin to describe how tender our steaks were. I almost died when I had my first bite. Literally, a gastronomic orgasm right there. Of course, then we HAD to get dessert. I was boring and went for Classic Creme Brulee which was amazing. C had Fresh Berries in whip cream. We couldn’t even get up after that meal. It was a VERY pricey dinner but it was worth every penny. We had an excellent server. I am comfortable no matter where I am but my friend C did not like the crowd. The water almost came out of my nose when she said, "Gee I have never felt so ethnic in my life." I had a great time. The food was great and I had good company. Nothing beats a gourmet dinner with a fun friend.

I am freakin’ fabulous, y’all know that? I am smart, fun, beautiful, funny and kind. Honey, I KNOW I am a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets. Conceited?…maybe a tad but not really. It’s all in the mind. I know I am so worth it…and then some. Now he sees it too…inner beauty I’ve always had but now, I radiate on the outside. I also finally allow myself to believe a compliment when I get one. A wolf whistle is NOT an insult…it’s merely an acknowledgment of a fact…fer sure!

I got that sway in my hips when I walk because I am freakin’ fabulous. I wouldn’t have half the confidence I have now without two people, N and C. I am very lucky to have them in my life. They taught me priceless lessons and now I live my life the way I see fit.

I believe in myself and therefore he does too. I always felt like a fat cow next to this gorgeous person and I never thought that he would find me attractive. We have great chemistry but I always felt that there wasn’t any physical attraction on his part. I was soooo wrong. Now I know he thinks I am flamin’ hot. I never knew the power I had over him…girl, I get him all hot and bothered just sliding up next to him. It’s not because I got traffic stopping looks but because I am confident, comfortable with myself and most of all, I am genuine. *wink*

In the past, I walk proud next to him because he was WITH me. Now I stand tall because I know he WANTS me. I don’t need him to define me but if I ever craved any approval; it would be his. Now that he is a convert, there’s no turning back. I feel freakin’ fabulous whether I am in my skinny jeans or sweats…now it’s YOUR turn, believing in yourself is the new feminism.

Inspired by my little TV marathon with him, I decided to take a quiz to see if I was a Bree, Susan, Lynette or Gabrielle. To check the accuracy of the quiz, I also sought the opinions of a friend, a relative and my man. Too my surprise…

You are Gabrielle Solis, the ex-model with everything she’s ever wanted; a rich husband, a big house and John, the 17-year-old gardener. (THE QUIZ)

I am really NOT Gabrielle. Excuse me, I will NEVER cheat on my man. I was very close to making a huge mistake but I managed to walk away and that is self-respect and discipline. The only thing she and I have in common is fashion sense! I am so hot, you go up in flames sitting next to me.

My best friend, E says I am Susan. She says I am fickle-minded when it comes to the man I love. I am hot and cold towards him even though I love him to death. I also do not know what I want from him but I know I want him. Damn that woman knows me well! (THE FRIEND)

My baby brother, Kevin, says I am Lynette because I am selfless and kind. I am very family oriented and don’t mind the sacrifices. I am not perfect but I always try my best, he says. Isn’t my baby brother the sweetest man alive? (THE RELATIVE)

He says I am the redhead - Bree. He says I am a perfectionist in every way. My OCD drives him up the wall. He still cannot believe I clean while he naps. He says I am too hyper (true, coz 80% of the time I am like a chihuahua on a sugar rush) and he frowns at my coffee intake (true, coz induce a little caffeine in me and I am bouncing off the walls). My obsessiveness, however, also cracks him up. He laughs at my neurosis from the bedroom to the dining room. He is absolutely amazed by me and adores me. (MY MAN)

In conclusion, I think there is a little bit of each of them in me…the best bits of course. Sexy and stylish like Gabby. Silly and clumsy like Susan. Kind and loving like Lynette. Perfectionist and clean freak like Bree. People you gotta love me! *wink*

I had the best week ever! I had so much fun this week. First, Ny and I talked on the phone for over two hours on Wednesday night. One hour before I hit the gym and had a great workout (coz the gym was deserted!) and another hour after I got home. She is a wonderful friend. She listens and gives the best advice because she truly understands me. Most of all she doesn’t judge me at all!

On Friday, as you recall, I had dinner with E at Serendipity. Good fun and great time bonding with her. We laughed and talked politics. It was great.

Then, clubbing on Saturday night and I had a blast! Met some really cute guys too and they made me feel freakin’ fab. Had some drinks and danced off the calories! W, N and J joined us for a little bit but they are no match for how wild Ny and I can be.

Called him on early Sunday morning (erm 1 am and then at 9 am) and he was the sweetest guy in the world. He took care of everything on Sunday. We hung out Sunday night. The cab driver got lost on the way there (bummer!). He called a million times worried and then he called back AGAIN to give the cabbie directions. He mentioned me to his mum (major step, trust me) and introduced me to his best friend.

We watched Season 1 of Desperate Housewives. Then, we talked about men, women, relationships, kids and basically everything all night. We even broached the subject of my mistake (which BTW he has forgiven) and our situation. He explained what he wants and we reached a compromise. Honestly though, that boy has got me wrapped around his finger and I am lovin’ it! The week just flew by and I just feel like I am on top of the world. I feel like the happiest, luckiest and sexiest woman on earth.

PS In case you are wondering, he called me ten minutes after I finished the previous blog. *wink* Ignore the contradiction and appreciate the irony!